- Have a firm handshake.
- Look people in the eye.
- Sing in the shower.
- Own a great stereo system.
- If in a fight, hit first and hit hard.
- Keep secrets.
- Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday.
- Always accept an outstretched hand.
- Be brave. Even if you’re not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.
- Avoid sarcastic remarks.
- Choose your life’s mate carefully. From this one decision will come 90 per cent of all your happiness or misery.
- Make it a habit to do nice things for people who will never find out.
- Lend only those books you never care to see again.
- Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all that they have.
- When playing games with children, let them win.
- Give people a second chance, but not a third.
- Be romantic.
- Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.
- Loosen up. Relax. Except for rare life-and-death matters, nothing is as important as it first seems.
- Don’t allow the phone to interrupt important moments. It’s there for our convenience, not the caller’s.
- Be a good loser.
- Be a good winner.
- Think twice before burdening a friend with a secret.
- When someone hugs you, let them be the first to let go.
- Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born.
- Keep it simple.
- Beware of the person who has nothing to lose.
- Don’t burn bridges. You’ll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river.
- Live your life so that your epitaph could read, No Regrets
- Be bold and courageous. When you look back on life, you’ll regret the things you didn’t do more than the ones you did.
- Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them.
- Remember no one makes it alone. Have a grateful heart and be quick to acknowledge those who helped you.
- Take charge of your attitude. Don’t let someone else choose it for you.
- Visit friends and relatives when they are in hospital; you need only stay a few minutes.
- Begin each day with some of your favorite music.
- Once in a while, take the scenic route.
- Send a lot of Valentine cards. Sign them, ‘Someone who thinks you’re terrific.’
- Answer the phone with enthusiasm and energy in your voice.
- Keep a note pad and pencil on your bed-side table. Million-dollar ideas sometimes strike at 3 a.m.
- Show respect for everyone who works for a living, regardless of how trivial their job.
- Send your loved ones flowers. Think of a reason later.
- Make someone’s day by paying the toll for the person in the car behind you.
- Become someone’s hero.
- Marry only for love.
- Count your blessings.
- Compliment the meal when you’re a guest in someone’s home.
- Wave at the children on a school bus.
- Remember that 80 per cent of the success in any job is based on your ability to deal with people.
- Don’t expect life to be fair.
Speaking at Y Combinator’s Startup School on 19th October, 2013, Twitter co-founder Jack Dorsey presented his version of the Do’s and Don’ts lists. He also told how he makes notes about each person he meets.
This is my first step towards compiling various Do’s and Don’ts lists i come across and leading an objective and quantified life.
- Stay present
- Be vulnerable
- Drink only lemon water and red wine
- Six sets of 20 squats and push-ups every day
- Run for 3 miles
- Meditate on this list
- Stand up straight
- Spend 10 minutes with a heavy bag
- Say hello to everyone
- Get 7 hours of sleep
- Don’t avoid eye contact
- Don’t be late
- Don’t set expectations that you can’t meet
- Don’t eat sugar
- Don’t drink hard liquor or beer during the weekday
I read Machiavelli’s play: La Mandragola (The Mandrake) the other day. Just wanted to share two nuggets of wisdom from the play. An astute observer of traits and character that Machiavelli is, there is surely some truth in them.
"Women are the most charitable people in the world, and the most annoying. If you brush them off, you banish both annoyance and advantage. If you entertain them, you end up with annoyance and advantage together. And the truth is that where there’s honey there’s [sic] flies." ~ Friar Timoteo
"It’s true what they say: it’s bad company that leads men to the gallows. And often people get into as much trouble for being too obliging and too nice as for being too mean." ~ Friar Timoteo
A guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.
And then, one evening when they’re driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: Do you realize that, as of tonight, we’ve been seeing each other for exactly six months?
And then there is silence in the car. To Elaine, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: Geez, I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he’s been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I’m trying to push him into some kind of commitment that he doesn’t want, or isn’t sure of.
And Roger is thinking: Gosh. Six months.
And Elaine is thinking: But, hey, I’m not so sure I want this kind of relationship, either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I’d have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily toward… I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?
And Roger is thinking: … so that means it was… let’s see … February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer’s, which means … lemme check the odometer … whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here.
And Elaine is thinking: he’s upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I’m reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed — even before I sensed it — that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that’s it. That’s why he’s so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He’s afraid of
And Roger is thinking: And I’m gonna have them look at the transmission again. I don’t care what those morons say, it’s still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It’s 87 degrees out, and this thing is shifting like a darn garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600.
And Elaine is thinking: He’s angry. And I don’t blame him. I’d be angry, too. God, I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I can’t help the way I feel. I’m just not sure.
And Roger is thinking: They’ll probably say it’s only a 90 day warranty. That’s exactly what they’re gonna say, the scumbags.
And Elaine is thinking: Maybe I’m just too idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I’m sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, schoolgirl romantic fantasy.
And Roger is thinking: Warranty? They want a warranty? I’ll give them a darn warranty. I’ll take their warranty and stick it right up their…
Roger, Elaine says aloud.
What? says Roger, startled.
Please don’t torture yourself like this, she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. Maybe I should never have .. Oh God, I feel so…(She breaks down, sobbing.)
What? says Roger. I’m such a fool, Elaine sobs. I mean, I know there’s no knight. I really know that. It’s silly. There’s no knight, and there’s no horse.
There’s no horse? says Roger.
You think I’m a fool, don’t you? Elaine says.
No! says Roger, glad to finally know the correct answer.
It’s just that … It’s that I … I need some time, Elaine says.
(There is a 15 second pause while Roger, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work.)
"Yes" he says.
(Elaine, deeply moved, touches his hand.)
"Oh Roger, do you really feel that way?" she says.
"What way?" says Roger.
"That way about time," says Elaine.
"Oh," says Roger. "Yes."
(Elaine turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.)
"Thank you, Roger", she says.
"Thank you," says Roger.
Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Roger gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a tennis match between two Czechoslovakians he never heard of. A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it’s better if he doesn’t think about it. (This is also Roger’s policy regarding world hunger.)
The next day Elaine will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification. They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions, but never getting bored with it, either.
Meanwhile, Roger, while playing racquetball one day with a mutual friend of his and Elaine’s, will pause just before serving, frown, and say: “Norm, you’ve known Elaine longer than I have. Did she ever own a horse?”
- An excerpt from http://www.amazon.com/Dave-Barrys-Complete-Guide-Guys/dp/0449910261
An incensed Emperor Bahadur Shah, with a force of 60,000 horsemen, now laid siege to Lohgarh. The Sikh forces consisted of around 3000 horsemen and foot soldiers combined. In the vicious hand-to-hand fighting, while a majority of Banda’s soldiers held the enemy at bay, he and a few of his men escaped. When Banda Singh was finally captured in the siege of the town of Gurdas Nangal (which was taken on 17 December 1715), the Mughals outdid themselves in barbarity. While 300 Sikhs were summarily executed and their heads stuffed with hay, mounted on spears and carried in a victory procession to Lahore, Banda was chained, shackled and locked in a cage, which was then carried on an elephant’s back along with the heads stuffed with hay. After Lahore had celebrated this spectacle, the procession then left for Delhi. After spells of torture alternating with attempts to buy him off, the prisoner was finally taken to the Qutub Minar (a thirteenth-century stone tower, 239 feet in height) where ‘they had him dismount, placed his child in his arms and bade him kill it. Then, as he shrank with horror from the act, they ripped open the child before the father’s eyes, thrust his quivering flesh into his mouth and hacked him to pieces limb by limb.
- Empire of the Sikhs, Patwant Singh
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream—-and not make dreams your master;
If you can think—-and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build’em up with worn-out tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings—-nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—-which is more—-you’ll be a Man, my son!
1. The world is trying to keep you stupid. From bank fees to interest rates to miracle diets, people who are not educated are easier to get money from and easier to lead. Educate yourself as much as possible for wealth, independence, and happiness.
2. Do not have faith in institutions to…
My all time favorite ghazal is Chupke Chupke Raat Din. Ghulam Ali breathed life into the words of Maulana Hasrat Mohani. Various artists have covered this ghazal and a few of these i’ve shared:
Ghulam Ali’s live:
Hans Raj Hans’ Cover:
The following cover is by one Ranjit Rajwada, a 17 year old contestant in Sa Re Ga Ma Pa. In fact this version seems to be better than that of Hans Raj Hans’ especially when you see a 17 year old boy singing it with much aplomb and maturity. I like the sher in the starting of the ghazal:
Apni aawaaz ki larzish pe toh qaaboo paalo,
Pyaar ke bol to honton se nikal jate hain.
Apne tewar to sambhaalo ke koi ye na kahein
Dil badalte hain to chehere bhi badal jate hain.
There’s a child in me still hiding behind the old tree
But aren’t we all hiding ‘til the moment we’re dying
And maybe I’m free, but freedom just means that I’m lost
It feels like I’m driving without ever arriving
Blackfield - Far Away